Dream, and roll up your sleeves

Years ago, I read an article by Genene Roth (author of Women, Food, and God).  A January article, on resolutions, yet with a different tack. She recommended changing resolutions from the big picture to the small steps. For example, "I will get fit" becomes "I'll start walking 20 minutes every day, and reassess in a month to change or add to this routine." Change "I will eat better" to "I'll eat fruit and/or veggies with every meal, and limit sweets to one small treat each day." If the big picture is "I'll get a better job," substitute "I'll research what I want to do and take a step, like a night class."

See the common thread? It's putting gas in the car and driving to Disneyland, instead of simply saying you're going to go.

Having dreams, desires, goals is important.  The trick, if you will, is to keep the destination in mind while actually taking practical steps toward it.

At bowling last week, Julia Morgan and I discussed score versus form. The 14-and-under bowlers want big scores.  They're thrilled at the higher numbers, and bummed at the gutter balls.  However, they tend to throw the ball down the lane as if how they do it has no effect on the number of pins that fall.  Kind of like rolling dice, or playing the lottery.  The idea of concentrating on form is difficult to grasp, because it feels like a letting go of the score. Which it is, in a way. By concentrating on swing, steps, release, on the transfer of energy that happens as the body moves, they will improve their form. As that happens, guess what else improves?  Say it with me: the score!

We want good marriages, but not to touch, converse, look each other in the eyes, greet each other happily every day.

We want well-behaved, happy, successful children, but we don't want to guide, teach, correct, and model good behavior them every day.

We want to be fit and trim, but not to make good choices at every meal, and move our wonderfully functioning bodies every day.

Basically, to be the person I want to be, I have to be the person I want to be.  I'm not going to suddenly become fulfilled if I don't know what I want and/or am not willing to do the work.  A person doesn't wake up one day and instantly become a marathoner and wanting it doesn't make it happen. It takes starting toward to goal, little steps that lead to other little steps.

Kathleen Whitfield posted a link on Facebook today to a 99percent.com article called Fix Bad Habits: Insights from a 7-year Obsession.  I love the analogy of sending a rocket into orbit for changing bad habits.  Basically, it takes energy and fuel at first, but with planning and the proper trajectory, you'll get into an orbit--the good habit. What doesn't quite gel is that it takes longer to replace habits than it does to launch a rocket, anywhere from 27 to 66 days, depending on who you read. :)

With these thoughts in mind, I'm taking a critical look at my life.  Where am I? Where/who do I want to be?  And most important: how do I get there?  I'll be back with ideas to share.

Decisions, Decisions...

I realize that blogging is very popular.  "Everybody does it."  Therefore, many companies offer options for the armchair writer.  Too many.

I started blogging (last week) by accident, while researching a class offered for homeschoolers.  The class was a webinar to teach kids how to make their own websites on a popular free site. Fifteen minutes into looking, I had a blog.  Pretty surprising for me, since I usually require trying out every site out there, weighing the pros and cons, basically putting off the whole experiment until perfection is achieved.  In other words, I don't do it.

This time, I waited until after a few posts, until a few friends posted on different blogging sites...and now I'm testing. Wouldn't you know it, the first alternate site has interesting reasons to switch.  Easier to layout, free fonts...  Trouble is, I don't know enough to know what's important.  That's the fun of it, though, right?  Gretchen Rubin, in The Happiness Project, discusses the importance of growth and challenge to our happiness.  We're more satisfied in what we do, if we are challenged in the doing of it.  Whether or not she's right, it helps me to keep frustration at bay holding onto the thought that it'll be worth it.

This month, The Ladies' Home Journal printed an article on a similar vein.  The gist: to be happier, make life a little harder.  Stop depending so much on convenience and "labor saving" devices, and enjoy the sense of accomplishment, the joy of working with your hands. 

I completely agree...in theory.  I don't see myself giving up my washer or sewing machine.  On the other hand, growing food, canning, and sewing all sound like wonderful ways to live.  Back to decision making: what to give up so that I have the time for these earthy, hands-on, creative pursuits?  And which blogging site is the absolute BEST?